Friday, October 10, 2014

Spain Lose Again, The Joy of Six, Roy Keane Is Still Talking, The End of the Line for Landycakes

We'll miss you...

There goes another week, Peeps. The big news from yesterday was Spain's loss to Slovakia. It was their fourth defeat in six matches and their first qualifying defeat since 2006! As you would expect, Sid Lowe is all over it. And all over it even more. Gracias, El Sid!

Haven't gotten your fill of Roy Keane? Have no fear. Word on the street is...Keano thinks José Mourinho is disgraceful. So, there you have it.

Argentina vs. Brazil. It's never a friendly, right? For money some reason they are playing this one in Beijing. Smog alert! Tune in tomorrow (8:05am EDT on beIN Sports USA), and try to watch through the haze. Kaká is back in the Brazilian side for the first time in like, 17 years or something. Here's some additional info for that one.

Perfect conditions in Beijing for the big Brazil/Argentina clash...

The Joy of Six is...Rabonas! Yes, From the father of the trick to Angel di María (via David Dunn), we celebrate half a dozen players indulging themselves. di María! Woop!

Landon Donovan. He's a complex man in a simple game. So says that Rog guy, anyway. So, Lando gets his weird send-off tonight in Hartford (7pm EDT on ESPN). Here are some articles:

USA vs. Ecuador: Preview
USA vs. Ecuador: Preview II

Amy Lawrence is talking Serie A! How odd. She usually sticks to the English topics. Here's her headline: Italy’s ambition grows to resurrect glory days for Serie A clubs. Cool!

Paolo Bandini is talking MLS! How odd. He usually sticks to the Italian topics. Here's his headline: Thierry Henry v Jermain Defoe – a rivalry that travelled from north London to North America. Cool!

Enjoy the weekend!



Thursday, October 09, 2014

England vs. San Marino! Slovakia vs. Spain! Moldova vs. Austria!

Oh, dear. It truly is an international break and the reality of it all is beginning to sink in. Ugh. Well, let's see what we can make out of it all. OK, it looks like Jonathan Wilson has found something attractive. It's Romania vs. Hungary and something about Satan. That match isn't until Saturday, though. What else? You want a preview for the England match? No. You want 10 Things To Look Out For? Done. The Best of the Crap? Fine. A schedule? Really? OK. Geez. Enough of that, already.

Roy Keane. He's been keeping us in stitches with his new book. John Brewin has read it and calls it, "fascinating." We do say...

Jozy Altidore. Suffice to say, things have not gone well for the Yank Abroad at the Stadium of Light. And he wants out. January is coming...

Landon Donovan. His last USA match is tomorrow night against Ecuador up in Hartford. Grant Wahl goes RAPID FIRE! with the retiring SoCal bruh. Speaking of Lando, his assGalaxy are heading toward an epic battle with Seattle. At least, according to this article.

International minnows' professions at San Marino, Andorra and Faroe Islands. "Unemployed" for the win. Good stuff.

That's it! Enjoy the quiet.



Wednesday, October 08, 2014

More Fun With Roy Keane, More Racism, Mesut Özil Out 10-12 Weeks

How is it Hump Day already? It can't be possible, but it is. Well, we're into an international break (first victim? Mesut Özil!) so things are slow. Filling the gap, however, is good old Roy Keane. More of his book has been released and the quotes just keep coming. Enjoy!

The Suarez Selfie...

Tottenham sold Gareth Bale to Real Madrid for a lot of dough. They used said dough to buy a lot of players. Andy Glockner writes that some of those players purchased are beginning to prove their worth.

Bloody Hell. We missed this at the weekend but apparently Wellington faced a racially motivated onslaught in Romania. Thankfully, there appears to be some sanity in all of this as the person who threw the banana has apologized and hi and Wellington publicly addressed the issue. Hopefully someone will learn something from all of this crap. Christ.

How about a nice story? Carlton Palmer. Remember him? Decent midfielder for Wednesday and Leeds? Made the England squad at some point. He's currently teaching in Shanghai and doing quite well. Very nice.

For the most part, international football sucks. Paul Parker has some ideas to improve the game.

And of the all-time favorites here at SSN Headquarters, Gabriel Batistuta, was inducted into the Fiorentina Hall of Fame. Batigol!!



Tuesday, October 07, 2014

Say Yes to Racism, Only Jews and Pussies, Scribes, MLS Reviews, Di Matteo in at Schalke, Roy Keane is Talking, The Zlatan is Talking

Fun times in Turin...

Hey Hey Hey! Loads to get through today! Some good stuff, too. Some not so good stuff, too. Paolo looks back at the referee-dominated Juve/Roma clash, Roy Keane is always suffering, The Zlatan is laughing, Sid Lowe is talking about the Valencia revival, more racist idiots, and Major League Soccer is providing some decent entertainment. Let's roll...

Gotta love The Zlatan, folks. Here's a great interview with the Swedish Sensation with the Big Nose.

Scribe Time!

Where? Spain. Who? Sid Lowe. What? Nuno hails Valencia's attacking style

Where? Spain. Again? Yes. OK. Who? Andy Brassell. What? Mathieu has gone from underwhelming to essential at Barca

Where? South America. Who? Tim Vickery. What? Kaka has stolen the spotlight, but Romulo's Brazil call-up is salient

Where? Germany. Who? Uli Hesse. What? Bayern's unique history with Oktoberfest

Where? Germany. Again? Yes. OK. Who? Raphael Honigstein. What? Dortmund threatened by new money

Where? Italy. Who? Paolo Bandini. What? Referee overshadows Juve/Roma

Roy Keane. We're scared shitless of the man. Always have been. Dude claims to live with a “self-destruct button.” No kidding, pal. Hang in there, though. One day at a time. Here are some of the best quotes from his book. The Schmeichel story is quite good.

Well, would you look at this? Former West Brom and Chelsea gaffer Roberto Di Matteo is the new man in charge at Schalke. Best of luck to you, Roberto.

It is Tuesday, and that means it's time for Marcotti's Musings. Today, Gab is gabbing about Juve-Roma flawed but brilliant, Arsenal and Chelsea battle, Dortmund's woe. Go and gab.

He's got a new manager!!

The Diving German has picked his squad for the Landon Donovan Tribute Match this Friday against Ecuador. Here it is:

Goalkeepers: Brad Guzan, Bill Hamid, Nick Rimando

Defenders: John Anthony Brooks, Timothy Chandler, Greg Garza, Omar Gonzalez, Michael Orozco Fiscal, Tim Ream, DeAndre Yedlin

Midfielders: Alejandro Bedoya, Joe Corona, Mikkel Diskerud, Luis Gil, Julian Green, Alfredo Morales

Forwards: Jozy Altidore, Landon Donovan, Joe Gyau, Miguel Ibarra, Bobby Wood

More crap with racist assholes today, sadly. Currently making headlines are Levski Sophia fans thanks to their "Say Yes To Racism" banner, and Partizan Belgrade fans thanks to the, "Only Jews and Pussies" banner they produced last week during the match with Spurs. UEFA has fined Partizan £30,000 and they'll have a section of their stadium closed for their next European match. Fuck off, Neanderthals.

Can you believe after all of the fabulous action on the pitches in Europe that there is also some pretty solid soccer happening Stateside? We're sorry, but it's true. Apparently Robbie Keane is lighting things up and D.C. United are going to the playoffs. Playoffs?! Playoffs?! Indeed. Take a look. Interested in Power Rankings? Bird's got them.

Podcast! On today's Football Weekly, AC Jimbo has Jacob Steinberg, Paolo Bandini and Ian McCourt in the pod to give their two-penneth on all the big talking points from the weekend in the Premier League. We start at Stamford Bridge, where José Mourinho once again out-witted poor Arsène Wenger to consign the Gunners to another defeat against Chelsea. The Blues stay five points clear of Manchester City, who beat Aston Villa – and look who's crept up to fourth: it's plucky Manchester United and their wonder-keeper David de Gea! Next, we hear from Sid Lowe as we begin our European round-up, which today takes in stops in Iceland and Scotland.

OK, we out.



Monday, October 06, 2014

Chelsea Defeat Arsenal, Weird Ref in Turin as Juve Edge Roma, Valencia Shock Atlético Madrid, Three Hat-Tricks in 15 Days For Ronaldo

I just want to know... are they real? Because they're fabulous!

Happy Monday! Yes, we had it planned all along. Head into Friday with a lovely photo of The Special One and Le Professeur and then return Monday with a shot of Le Professeur losing it and doing a full double boob grab of The Special One's breastageses. You're welcome. Right, so let's get to the fallout!

Liverpool 2 - 1 West Brom

Manchester United 2 - 1 Everton

Chelsea 2 - 0 Arsenal

Tottenham 1 - 0 Southampton

Good Grief! Ronny got three more in Real Madrid's romp over Bilbao. At this rate, he'll... And here are Five Things We Learned in La Liga over the weekend. More tomorrow with El Sid.
Over in Italy, the top-of-the-table clash between Juventus and Roma did not fail to provide plenty of controversy. The ref awarded three dubious penalties before Juve eventually came out on top. James Horncastle has a report here, and we'll have more tomorrow with Paolo.

And's Oktoberfest, and you know what that means! Yes, plenty of Bayern Munich players and their families looking and feeling awkward.