The Joy of Six: Great Moments in Football Commentary

From Barry Davies to David Coleman, via the jingoistic rantings of Italy and Holland's finest, Scott Murray recalls famous moments behind the mic.

5) Jack van Gelder, Netherlands v Argentina, 1998

"Dennis Bergkamp! Dennis Bergkamp! Dennis Bergkamp! Dennis Bergkamp! Dennis Bergkamp! Dennis Bergkamp! Dennis Bergkamp! Dennis Bergkamp! Uh-e-uh-e-uh!"

"I suddenly have the feeling that we will progress to the semi-finals," said Dutch commentator Jack van Gelder with two minutes left of Holland's nail-biting quarter-final with Argentina in the 1998 World Cup. Seconds later, Dennis Bergkamp took receipt of a raking long ball, switched feet, and swept the ball past Carlos Roa. Cue van Gelder going into nuclear meltdown: he screams "Dennis Bergkamp" eight times before launching into an incredibly strange Jimmy Savile impersonation. Pure jingoistic passion, and a stunning mix of prescience and lunacy. Compare and contrast to Jimmy Hill's pathetic pseudo-Brazilian "Gooooaaaalll!" as Gary Lineker smashed a hat-trick past Poland in 1986; we simply can't do this sort of thing. Nor should we try.