Monday, August 19, 2013

Don't Call It A Comeback. Seriously.

Holy Christ. We're back. Listen. Pimpin' ain't easy, and something had to give. That something was SSN Headquarters. We shut the shit down. Closed up shop and took to the hills. Now, we're back.

As it turns out, we didn't miss much. Freddy Adu moved to Brazil, The Big Red-Faced One relinquished the reins of The Reds to Moe Sizlak, Sprockets danced their way to Champions League domination, and Arsenal finished above Spurs. Again.

The Special One is back at Stamford Bridge and John Terry is still a slug sucking the asshole of Jiminy Glick. The Diving German guided The Yanks to a Gold Cup win and a lovely result over Boz and Hertz thanks to a rejuvenated Jozy.

England still suck, and Brazil knocked Spain off their pedestal. Some other crap happened but that's basically the gist of it all.

So, what's new? The EPL is now on NBC in the USA. It's not bad, either. So far, so good, we think. Solid commentators via the UK feeds, no crazy Gus Johnson hyperbole, no Eric Wynalda and Warren "When I Played For England" Barton (crap wanker), and best of all, it is a new campaign. Without skipping a beat, defending champs Manchester United went to Wales and made a difficult fixture look easy, Chelsea turned on the style to welcome Jose back to London, Spurs won in South London, and Arsenal shat the bed. Liverpool? They won. Richard Jolly was at Anfield.

Talking Points? But, of course. Here are TEN.

Monday Night Football is also back as City's San Pellegrino Era kicks off this afternoon with the blue side of Manchester hosting Newcastle. 3pm EDT on NBCSN. City have over a gazillion pounds worth of new signings, don't you know?

Barcelona won 7-0 (yawn), Bayern Munich and Borussia Dortmund still look strong, and Yank Not Abroad Juan Agudelo scored this cheeky little number to help NE defeat Chicago.

That's it for now. We're going to need to ease back into this thing. Some of the SSN staff remain on sabbatical and the office is quiet. Too quiet. Give us some time to reacclimatize. Of course we can't leave without The Mill. And here's your Plus One. Ummmm, you're welcome!



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