More Fun With Sepp, USA vs. China, Peru Advance, Argentina vs. Colombia

Well, Argentina play tonight, so, you know...

Woof! There goes another one! We've got loads of great stuff to get to today, so let's do it! Sadly, we'll have to begin with SPECTRE FIFA. Yes, good 'ol Sepp says, "Wait. Hold the phone. I didn't say I'd resign. I never said that." Asshole.

Back on the grass pitch, Peru advanced to the semifinals of Copa América on the back of a hat-trick from Paolo Guerrero. Tim Vickery was at the Estadio Germán Becker and filed this report.

Tonight? Argentina vs. Colombia! Check the rhyme:

Argentina vs. Colombia: Preview

Tim Vickery: Key Battles

Jonathan Wilson: James irked at Copa América, a year on from WC wonder goal

Gabriele Marcotti: Questions for Pekerman

Miguel Delaney: Time for the stars to come out, and Falcao to fade away

As for Copa América's Buttgate? Jara's club side Mainz ain't having it. They say he can piss off. Good for them. And remember when the U.S. beat Argentina at Copa América in 1995? We sure do. So do Wynalda and Alexi.

Over on the not-grass pitch, it's Quarterfinal time. The USA Women face the Chinese in the late game (7:30 p.m. EDT on FOX), and the Germans play the French in the early match. Here we go:

USA vs. China: Preview

Grant Wahl: USA remains confident

Jeff Carlisle: All eyes on the U.S. midfield

Kevin McCauley: USWNT have to play the 'wrong way' to beat China

Andrew Gibney: Four Key Battles

With these two international tournaments in motion, we've been neglecting Major League Soccer. According to this article, there is a big week coming up. Rivalry Week, in fact. Juicy!

Pirlo

Backheel Breakfast

The Mill. Plus One. Plus Plus One.

And finally...Atlanta United FC? Really?

Onward!

-SSN

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