Monday, November 05, 2012

A Rogue Sprinkler and Juventus Lose

Monday, monday, monday... Let's dive right in with The Fifth Official, shall we? He/She always enjoys a dig at Arsenal and after their inept performance at Old Trafford, there are plenty of reasons to have a go. Throw in some classic AVB and Sparky failings, and it's all too easy for the Monday column.

Yes, both North London clubs were particularly poor. We were out and about Saturday afternoon and asked to describe Arsenal's performance. Since our mate Ryan was in Manchester for the match (as was Phil McNulty), and we had been texting back and forth prior to kick-off, and he works here, it was perhaps fitting that the first adjective that popped up was "flaccid". And don't you know the old scribe Richard Williams nicked our term for his column? Thief. Anyway, United strolled to an easy victory and are now top of the table. We didn't see the match at White Hart Lane, but don't worry too much, Tottenham fans. Wigan are pretty good.

Elsewhere, Liverpool and Newcastle drew in a match that included a lovely bit of skill from one Luis Suarez. Now THAT is a nice goal. The match also featured a sprinkler gone rogue. See the video above. The other team in Manchester? You mean the one that wears Carolina blue? Let's just say that none of the following players managed to score at West Ham: Carlos Tevez, Sergio Agüero, Mario Balotelli, Edin Dzeko, Samir Nasri, Yaya Touré. Basically players who cost about the same as the GDP of a decent-sized nation.

Talking points. Everybody loves Talking Points. Here are 10.

The Soccer of the Major League variety. Playoffs. Break it down like this!

Holy shit. Stop the presses. Juventus and their Chuck Norris-like talisman Andrea Pirlo lost to Inter Milan. It's their first loss in 50 matches in Serie A. It's their first loss EVER in their new ground. Suddenly, after a crap start to the season, Inter are the form team in Serie A. Funny old game. More on that from Paolo domani.

AC Milan, you say? Well, they won convincingly at the San Siro against Chievo. And Chris Bevan chats with their winger Urby Emanuelson about all their recent changes.

Spain. Right. Real Madrid and Barcelona both won. What more do you want? We'll let Phil and Sid hash it out for us tomorrow.

Would you care to see Stuart Holden talking about the state of soccer in the States?

Right. Off you go.

Wait! There's Monday Night Football. West Brom (not bad so far) host Southampton (God-awful so far). Here's a preview.


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