What's In Your Wallet Cup?, Clattenburg Dropped After Sheeran Gig, Midweek Serie A Action, Tevez Back With Argentina, MLS

That's better. We took a wee break but we're back on this fine Hump Day. It was quite the weekend, what with Real Madrid and Barcelona squaring off, and Chelsea and Manchester United going at it. Hey! West Ham beat Manchester City and are in the Top Four! How did that happen!?

There were some fine goals, too. Here they are. Let's call them...Goals of the Week (plus Tackle of the Week and Miss of the Week).

He scores when he wants. Which is not terribly often, mind...

The League Cup had some matches yesterday. Matches of note? Well, Chelsea edged Shrewsbury Town to advance. Jamie Jackson was at New Meadow and filed this report. Mario Balotelli scored and Liverpool left it late to edge Swansea City. Andy Hunter was at Anfield and filed this report. Richard Jolly was there as well and came away with Three Thoughts about the contest.

Today you've got Manchester City vs. Newcastle, Tottenham vs. Brighton, and Stoke vs. Southampton.

Major League Soccer. What the hell is going on in that league? This helps us find out. Thank you, Grant Wahl, Brian Straus, Bird (Power Rankings!), etc. You want a MEGA MLS PLAYOFF PREVIEW? We will make it so.

Graham Hunter wants to talk about Diego Simeone and Atlético Madrid. We shall let him do so.

We all hate Mark Clattenburg, right? A ref who wants the spotlight, who jokes with gaffers, who, well, sucks? Yes. Anyhoo, he won't be working this weekend. He broke some rules and went to see Ed Sheeran. Shame.

Sad, but true...

This is some midweek action in Serie A to get you through to Saturday. Here's a preview. You're looking at Fiorentina vs. Udinese, Inter vs. Sampdoria, and Genoa vs. Juventus, among others.

In Spain they'll play some Copa del Rey today. Looks like Real Madrid face some club called Cornholeia. Good luck with that. Meanwhile, in the League, Sevilla are the surprise package thus far. Let's investigate, shall we?

Tim Vickery is reporting from South America. His focus is on Argentina and the return of a certain Carlos Tevez to the national side.

And finally...this English FA official is a Neanderthal.

Onward!!

-SSN