Off the Ball never rests in its mission to scratch around the underbelly of professional football to find the most bizarre, humorous and inexplicable stories.
This week, Andres Iniesta temporarily ditches Barcelona to become an albino pirate, Zlatan Ibrahimovic accidentally knocks out a team-mate, disgruntled fans waste perfectly good cooked sausages and chicken drumsticks pelting players, and Louis Saha explains why some footballers prefer to use escort girls.
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