Quotes & Chants of the Week

"I offered to shave off my beard and put on some make-up and then I'd have looked like my missus!"
Derby County's Robbie Savage after turning up at the airport with his wife's passport for a friendly in the Netherlands.

"I was joking on the sidelines saying 'You Americans have been dying to get it to four quarters and you finally got it!'"
David Beckham after LA Galaxy's Western Conference play-off final with Houston was plagued by power cuts.

"Apart from the goal I don't think it was a bad performance."
Jermaine Jenas was obviously playing in a different game to the one everyone else was watching, following his comments on England-Brazil.

"I will fly to the Balkans to meet with a female doctor who helped (PSV Eindhoven midfielder) Danko Lazovic.She is vague about her methods, but I know she massages you using fluid from a placenta."
Robin van Persie is hoping his career will be reborn after damaging ankle ligaments while playing for the Netherlands against Italy.

"If you hide behind cliches, we'll be dead and buried by January."
Falkirk defender Darren Barr brilliantly launches a ban on cliches. With a cliche.

"When we go to work and perform invariably it is in front of thousands. If we don't do our jobs, it gives the opportunity for people to criticise when they have not put their heads over the parapet and tried it themselves."
Mark Hughes addresses criticism of Wayne Bridge by Match of the Day's Alan Hansen - who won three European Cups, eight league titles, and was capped by Scotland 26 times.

Jon Champion on ESPN: "Who do you think will replace the injured Riera?"
Chris Waddle: "Well, it`s not gonna be Gerrard. It definitely wont be Gerrard. I can`t see him coming on."
Champion: "...so Liverpool send on Steven Gerrard for the injured Riera."
Radio commentary in the midweek game at Anfield.

"We hate England more than you!"
Scottish fans to their Welsh counterparts during the friendly in Cardiff.

The Rest